Showing posts with label Sausagefest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sausagefest. Show all posts

Thursday, March 1, 2007

For Strong Women Everywhere


Reading this blog, something occurred to me. We are chauvinists. Alright men, Mr. Feelings hasn't made his three marriages last a collective decade by acting the fool. So, ladies, this is for you.

First, this is what I look like.











Second, I'm sorry for the less sensitive posts on sexy advertising, weight loss,rainbow parties, and sausage fests. Let me make it up to you with a poem by Maya Angelou.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

She was writing about your lady parts. They are beautiful.

Third, I'm here to listen to you. So starting now I'm listening. (Below is a symbolic gap in text where I'm letting you do the talking.)









Wow, I heard everything you said, and yes, I agree.

And last but not least, I read Cathy too.
See, it's funny because she's like a real woman, not the whore Blondie.

I know this is just step one of a multi-step healing process, but everything has a beginning.

P.S. I'll be selling my book this weekend at the Promise Keepers meet-up in Anaheim. Men, bring your wallets and an open heart.

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Saturday, February 24, 2007

Where All The Ladies At?

I can match you on thirty-THREE levels.....ladies


I'm a staunch supporter of Los Angeles. Amongst my friends, I'm the most vocal advocate that this is the place to be. The great weather, the vapid constituency, and the film industry all make it just a great place to call home.

If you don't move to LA when you graduate from my alma mater, you go to New York City. I've always thought New York was a fantastic place to visit, but a punishing, unforgiving place to live.

Unfortunately, I now must concede one point to New York: they've got the ladies. Stats and facts don't lie, and the proof is in the pudding: Los Angeles is a sausage fest. Still, we've got better weather.


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