For Strong Women Everywhere

Reading this blog, something occurred to me. We are chauvinists. Alright men, Mr. Feelings hasn't made his three marriages last a collective decade by acting the fool. So, ladies, this is for you.

First, this is what I look like.











Second, I'm sorry for the less sensitive posts on sexy advertising, weight loss,rainbow parties, and sausage fests. Let me make it up to you with a poem by Maya Angelou.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

She was writing about your lady parts. They are beautiful.

Third, I'm here to listen to you. So starting now I'm listening. (Below is a symbolic gap in text where I'm letting you do the talking.)









Wow, I heard everything you said, and yes, I agree.

And last but not least, I read Cathy too.
See, it's funny because she's like a real woman, not the whore Blondie.

I know this is just step one of a multi-step healing process, but everything has a beginning.

P.S. I'll be selling my book this weekend at the Promise Keepers meet-up in Anaheim. Men, bring your wallets and an open heart.

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She's Gotta Have It

Mr. Feelings understands that we are sexual beings by nature. That is why Suze Orman disgusts me. This headline says it all:

Suze Orman Reveals She is the '55-year-old Virgin'

Sacré bleu!

A closer read of the story reveals Suze's life partner of seven years is some guy called Kathy Travis (funny name for a man, I know). I have some unsolicited advice for Ms. Orman in the form of an open letter.

Dear Ms. Orman,
While perusing the internet today, I stumbled upon a shocking revelation. I think you know which one. No, not your stock advice on Ford Motor Co. It's about your "V" card, silly.

It's alway been Mr. Feeling's philosophy that a sound body leads to a sound mind. And sound bodies need love. The sexy kind of love. Travis obviously has no idea what to do with a hot little number like yourself. Perhaps it's time you broadened your horizons to include, I don't know, me.

I'm tender, passionate and very experienced. Your wealth doesn't intimidate me. It's actually a turn on, just like your close cropped hair. By the way, I like that style, but it kind of does send the wrong message. I mean, it's a little... masculine.

Anyway, the offer is out there, Suze. You've got a lot on your mind, let me take care of your body.

Sincerely,
Mr. Feelings
P.S.
Oh, and yes, my blood work came back clean.


P.P.S.
For our friends in Germany, JACK BAUER!

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Mr. Feelings Has Arrived!

Hi there! My name is Mr. Feelings, and I love you! I'll be stopping by from time to time to answer life's tough questions. Any and everything is fair play with me. No, really, anything! Work, love, sex, heck, I'll even tell you where to find a great steak next time you're in Bennetville, Indiana (the answer is Montgomery's Buffet... shhhh).

Do we have any teenage readers? Female? First period? Write me! I'll help you feel this thing out.

I'm young, but people say I have a wise soul. Let me share that wisdom with you! Write me at: mr.feelings@gmail.com
I love you!
Mr. Feelings

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