Flexing Our Intellectual Muscles

Here's a fact you probably didn't know. Three of the seven writers who make up Mr. Limpet were members of Algonquin Round Table. Since those wonderful days our intellectual pursuits have faltered, bottoming out along with it, our sense of humor. A fart echoing in an empty hallway is enough to send us into hysterics. We don't even listen to our old Capitol Steps tapes anymore. We've had enough; we're getting back to the format that made us great: high-brow satire. We're a little rusty, so bear with us after the jump.

Target the first, Mr. President:


Suppose he'll try and blame the Democrats for that one. Oh, wait. Read the caption. He blames it on diarrhea. That's a little less witty, but you get the point.

Target the second, Attorney General Alberto Gonzalez:


Looks like your mom is gonna get indicted... for being sexy. Sorry Alberto, but if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen. Hold on, didn't read that article. Oh, wow. Hmmm... wonder if there's a way to tie in this scandal with a "your mom" joke. Because if you could, that would just bring it to another level.

Target the third, Mr. Bush once again (gotta pay the cost to be the boss):


What's this? The President has a boner? We've seen it all!

Well, we hope this made you laugh, but more importantly, we hope it made you think. There's a lot happening in the world out there, so read a paper, pay attention to U2 lyrics, and donate to whatever charity Gwyneth Paltrow is a member of.