The house is lovely, but there's poo everywhere

I am clearly some sort of hack finding stories at Drudge Report (bloggers blogging bloggers!), but it's my one stop shop for links about grandmothers being eaten by sharks the size of semi trucks and chupacabra running for president so fucking deal with it.

The point is I have finally found the dream home in Long Island I've been looking for my entire life! And I don't even have to bring my own trash, urine or feces to decorate (I love model homes!)

A slew of great quotes in this story - it sort of reads like a dirty romance novel only instead of talk about naughty bits it's a nightmarish account of squalor found inside someone's home - but I don't think you'll find much better a quote anywhere than this baby right here:

There was just feces all over, [it's the] most horrible situation you could ever imagine.

Sounds wonderful. The perfect spot to rear one's young, or at least that's what the woman who lived there with her 3 daughters seemed to think.

...compared the living conditions of his daughters, ages 10, 12, and 14, to a war camp, calling them "prisoners." He used to live in the Nevada Street home in Lindenhurst with his wife, Deborah. But during their bitter six year separation, he says he had not seen the girls or their filthy and unhealthy living conditions.

Awesome. By the way he is going to use this as evidence to give him custody of the kids, but I'm not so sure the case is rock solid. I mean there wasn't even a lounge chair made out of a neighbor and the law clearly states that human furniture is the only grounds for custody change.