Wednesday, February 28, 2007

When Heroin Doesn't Work Out as Your New Weight Loss Program

Recently we have seen a real rise in the laziest ways to get fit. From fad diets to that guy that lost 25lbs. playing his Nintendo Wii, we have seen a serious decline in traditional exercise. Science has rendered us great technology that will allow us to do as little work as possible to attain those tasty abs we've all been wanting to show off at our P. Diddy all white Miami beach party that we were once too embarrassed to go to.

I still say the best cheap weight loss method to date that really hasn't caught on much as a fad in the mainstream's eye is good ol' fashioned heroin, but what the hell. I guess I'll fill you in on all these other amazing products to lessen the fat with the least amount of work possible.

Get fit, sort of, with the Moustache after the jump...

Most of these items can probably be found in the Sharper Image catalogue where you can get that handy cd player that plays cds vertically! (Seriously, horizontal cd players are so yesterday.)

1.
The good ol' fashioned diet pill:

Ah, yes. Speed and if it's not speed, then what's the point? I guess it's gotta work because Anna Nicole Smith supported it and if you're not convinced because of her endorsement then I'm sure
the new Bro Doctor could convince you.



2.
Shock Therapy:

I know what the guy that came up with this was thinking while working in the mental ward: "Hmm. You know what? All my shock therapy patients are incredibly skinny. Maybe there's a connection." BAM! Millionaire. That's right. Like the ad says, you can do it at work, at home, while eating that deep fried chicken stuffed crust pizza dipped in ranch dressing. Doesn't sound too bad, right? Do nothing and get rock hard tasty abs you've been dreaming of. Hey, if it gets out of control you could always do this.


3.
The iJoyRide:
Ok, not only is this device grasping on the i(fill in the blank) fad, but also reaching out to those that so desperately want to be involved in the equestrian scene. That's right, all you have to do is sit! Wow. There went that pizza you ate yesterday and you're also working on your coordination. I mean you can't really buy this much happiness for $500 anywhere else.

(Note: play the video to the right to get the full vision of happiness you can experience)
.

210 comments:

1 – 200 of 210   Newer›   Newest»
Nacho Friendly said...

I'm pretty sure Robespierre at the highway rest stop had one of those iFill. Except the fill part was more concerned with my ass than my physical fitness, but really, aren't those two closely tied?

Might I also add, whenever discussing the slimming effects of heroin, we mention the patron saint? I, for one, am VERY happy we don't have to deal with a 40 (!!) year old Kurt today.

Unknown said...

That I-joyride is amazing! I am ordering 3, one for work, one for home, and one to replace the driver's seat in my automobile!!!

Greg II said...

Personally I choose to lose weight the old fashioned way - by beating my wife

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol free shipping tramadol hcl generic name - tramadol dosage in humans

Anonymous said...

generic ativan online illegal buy lorazepam online - can you buy ativan mexico

Anonymous said...

order tramadol tramadol jitters - tramadol hcl mechanism of action

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol buy tramadol online usa - tramadol sr tabs 100mg

Anonymous said...

tramadol buy online pharmacy tramadol cheap - tramadol hcl while breastfeeding

Anonymous said...

ativan price buy ativan online no prescription needed - ativan side effects withdrawal symptoms

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol cod fedex tramadol for dogs how long to take effect - tramadol withdrawal high blood pressure

Anonymous said...

klonopin anxiety overdose on klonopin death - klonopin withdrawal nightmares

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol no rx tramadol dosage for dogs - tramadol for dogs human consumption

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol buy tramadol overnight no prescription - tramadol no prescription cheap

Anonymous said...

buy discount tramadol tramadol ultram side effects - tramadol recreational dose

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online mastercard overnight buy tramadol in florida - tramadol online pharmacy overnight

Anonymous said...

buy ambien buy generic ambien online no prescription - ambien dosage increases

Anonymous said...

buy klonopin online klonopin online no prescription overnight - klonopin side effects forum

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol cod fedex where to buy tramadol online forum - order tramadol online overnight delivery

Anonymous said...

klonopin buy seroquel klonopin overdose - 2mg klonopin weed

Anonymous said...

tramadol online tramadol dosage overdose - tramadol hcl ep

Anonymous said...

where to buy tramadol buy tramadol no rx - order tramadol overnight

Anonymous said...

ambien for sale no prescription ambien side effects of long term use - street price of ambien

Anonymous said...

purchase soma buy cheap soma online no prescription - soma medication buy online

Anonymous said...

buy cheap klonopin generic klonopin dosage - buy clonazepam india

Anonymous said...

generic ambien ambien dosage for kids - ambien and alcohol and death

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online buy tramadol online in australia - tramadol online yahoo

Anonymous said...

where to buy tramadol order generic tramadol - tramadol withdrawal in a neonate

Anonymous said...

soma price soma bras nyc - soma bras usa

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol cod online tramadol hcl 93 58 - tramadol hcl liver damage

Anonymous said...

klonopin buy klonopin dosage opiate withdrawal - klonopin side effects brain

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online tramadol online 180 - online pharmacy for ultram

Anonymous said...

soma online soma 250 pills - buy soma store

Anonymous said...

buy klonopin online no prescription klonopin quick acting - klonopin withdrawal tremors

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online mastercard overnight tramadol withdrawal buprenorphine - using tramadol withdrawal opiates

Anonymous said...

ativan for anxiety ativan dosage claustrophobia - ativan buy online no prescription

Anonymous said...

tramadol overnight shipping tramadol information - buy tramadol hydrochloride online usa

Anonymous said...

tramadol online tramadol zofran interaction - buy tramadol online with a cod

Anonymous said...

ambien online no prescription ambien side effects skin rash - ambien or lunesta

Anonymous said...

buy ambien online no prescription 3 mg lunesta vs 10 mg ambien - ambien withdrawal benadryl

Anonymous said...

ambien drug ambien sleep long - ambien stage 4 sleep

Anonymous said...

buy soma online discount for soma - soma muscle

Anonymous said...

buy viagra online viagra online dk - legal buy generic viagra

Anonymous said...

buy viagra no prescription buy viagra from india - generic viagra online in usa

Anonymous said...

klonopin pills klonopin liver - generic klonopin identification

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol cash on delivery buy tramadol topix - tramadol snort

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online tramadol xl dosage - buy tramadol online mastercard overnight

Anonymous said...

buy ambien online ambien generic looks like - ambien good sleep aid

Anonymous said...

somas online generic equivalent soma - 350 mg soma lot

Anonymous said...

buy viagra online how to viagra online - brand viagra online canadian pharmacy

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online no prescription tramadol hcl ibuprofen - buy ultram online without rx

Anonymous said...

buy soma buy soma online - aura soma online store

Anonymous said...

order viagra viagra buy generic - viagra dosage effectiveness

Anonymous said...

buy klonopin online canada klonopin withdrawal relief - buspar vs klonopin for anxiety

Anonymous said...

viagra drug buy viagra online uk no prescription - buy viagra london over counter

Anonymous said...

online soma soma of a neuron - soma pill high

Anonymous said...

tramadol buy tramadol online in canada - order tramadol saturday delivery

Anonymous said...

buy viagra usa purchase viagra line - viagra y sus efectos secundarios

Anonymous said...

ambien buy price of ambien - online doctor prescription ambien

Anonymous said...

generic ambien ambien sleep driving statistics - ambien generic quality

Anonymous said...

buy viagra alternative cheap reliable viagra - cheap viagra next day

Anonymous said...

cheap klonopin online generic version klonopin - klonopin dosage for high

Anonymous said...

soma online buy soma carisoprodol online - soma cube

Anonymous said...

ambien pill flexeril ambien drug interactions - ambien cr 12.5 not working

Anonymous said...

klonopin sale buy klonopin online canada - stopping klonopin cold turkey

Anonymous said...

generic ambien online can you buy ambien in mexico - ambien side effects back pain

Anonymous said...

cheap carisoprodol cheap holidays to soma bay - best soma bras

Anonymous said...

buy viagra buy female viagra online canada - how to order viagra in india

Anonymous said...

buy soma online order soma mastercard - soma 350 mg drug interactions

Anonymous said...

cheap carisoprodol buy soma muscle relaxant online - generic brand of soma

Anonymous said...

order viagra for women buy viagra online $0.54 per dose - viagra sale online pharmacy

Anonymous said...

viagra online generic viagra jelly - buy viagra cheap online uk

Anonymous said...

soma online aura soma 94 - soma urban dictionary

Anonymous said...

tramadol overnight shipping best online pharmacy tramadol - can you get tramadol online legally

Anonymous said...

buy viagra cheap viagra online pharmacy - order viagra europe

Anonymous said...

buy viagra and cialis online generic female viagra 100mg - buy cheap viagra online canada

Anonymous said...

buy carisoprodol online soma benzodiazepine drug test - soma drug half life

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol with cod signs of tramadol overdose - cheap tramadol with no prescription

Anonymous said...

buy generic viagra online overnight usa viagra cheap info - viagra buy online no prescription uk

Anonymous said...

viagra online no prescriptions viagra za muskarce - does viagra work after eating

Anonymous said...

buy viagra online fast delivery viagra online canada - viagra online quick delivery

Anonymous said...

buy viagra online without rx viagra dosage options - viagra zonder recept

Anonymous said...

viagra online viagra online store india - should buy generic viagra

Anonymous said...

propecia online propecia no shedding - propecia qatar

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online cod tramadol 50mg tablets get high - buy tramadol online overnight usa

Anonymous said...

order cialis online cialis yan etkileri - cheap cialis soft tabs

Anonymous said...

generic sildenafil viagra online bestellen ohne rezept - is it legal to buy generic viagra online

Anonymous said...

how to order viagra buy viagra canada safely - dangers cheap viagra

Anonymous said...

buy viagra from canada buy viagra online australia fast delivery - viagra online reputable

Anonymous said...

order viagra online cheap buy viagra online sydney - buy viagra online in the uk

Anonymous said...

buy finasteride online propecia results youtube - can you buy propecia in australia

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol ultram buy tramadol online in australia - buy tramadol usa

Anonymous said...

cheap viagra next day delivery purchase viagra online pharmacy - generic viagra samples

Anonymous said...

cialis online generic cialis vs brand name cialis - generic cialis australia

Anonymous said...

how to order viagra viagra soft tabs - buy pink viagra for women

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol without prescriptions tramadol hcl 50 mg drug interactions - tramadol high like

Anonymous said...

buy cheap propecia propecia generic 1mg - order propecia canada

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol no prescription overnight tramadol overdose liver failure - tramadol zyrtec interaction

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online clorhidrato de tramadol 100mg - tramadol 50 mg can you get high

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tablets tramadol ultram over the counter - how to buy tramadol online

Anonymous said...

cialis online cialis mexico - cialis 50mg pills

Anonymous said...

buy retin a online retin a cream large pores - difference between retin-a gel and cream

Anonymous said...

buy viagra buy viagra legally - viagra online ratings

Anonymous said...

cialis online buy cialis brand online - where to buy cialis online no prescription

Anonymous said...

buy retin-a online does retin a cream help acne - retin a acne side effects

Anonymous said...

generic tramadol buy tramadol online in the usa - tramadol 100 mg /ml

Anonymous said...

buy strattera online what does the drug strattera do - strattera 60 mg side effects

Anonymous said...

tramadol no rx tramadol hcl like vicodin - tramadol 50 mg vs percocet

Anonymous said...

tramadol 50mg buy tramadol overnight with mastercard - buy tramadol hydrochloride

Anonymous said...

tramadol online buy tramadol hydrochloride online usa - side effects tramadol hcl 50mg tablet

Anonymous said...

tramadol online pharmacy buy tramadol store - tramadol 100mg buy online

Anonymous said...

buy propecia online can you buy propecia thailand - much does propecia cost boots

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online tramadol no prescription cheap - tramadol 50mg tablets cost

Anonymous said...

tramadol online tramadol 50mg grasscity - take tramadol 50 mg get high

Anonymous said...

tramadol 50mg tramadol 50 mg euphoria - possible get high tramadol

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol buy tramadol overnight - tramadol dosage rxlist

Anonymous said...

buy retin-a buy retin a micro cream - retin a gel rosacea

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tramadol lethal dose - tramadol dosage severe pain dogs

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol order tramadol overnight - buy tramadol in canada

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online buy tramadol online usa cheap - buy tramadol online from usa

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online without a prescription buy tramadol cod - tramadol for dogs 50mg dosage

Anonymous said...

order tramadol no prescription tramadol buy online usa - tramadol 50 mg veterinary use

Anonymous said...

buy generic tramadol tramadol hcl 30 - tramadol 50 mg

Anonymous said...

buy propecia online cheap propecia buy online - propecia discount card

Anonymous said...

tramadol online cheap tramadol 180 - tramadol cause high

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription gov us buy viagra - buy viagra and cialis

Anonymous said...

buy viagra cheap viagra for sale - viagra online at

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online with mastercard tramadol dosage compared to vicodin - order tramadol online cheap

Anonymous said...

tramadol online tramadol with alcohol high - tramadol online in usa

Anonymous said...

tramadol 50 mg buy tramadol overnight with mastercard - tramadol addiction therapy

Anonymous said...

buy sildenafil viagra online in us - levitra vs viagra for women

Anonymous said...

generic cialis cialis daily use 5 mg - cialis daily dose effectiveness

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription viagra 100mg effects - cheap generic viagra overnight delivery

Anonymous said...

cheap viagra buy viagra online los angeles - cheap viagra fast delivery

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol uss cheap tramadol - tramadol

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online no prescription cialis online+toronto - cialis online sale

Anonymous said...

generic cialis how to buy cialis online - cialis informacion en espanol

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol лекарство трамадол - tramadol dosage canine

Anonymous said...

viagra 100mg dosage of viagra for women - does viagra work on paraplegics

Anonymous said...

cialis online canada buy viagra cialis online - generic cialis user reviews

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online tramadol hcl liver - tramadol 50 mg hydrocodone

Anonymous said...

generic viagra viagra usa - buy viagra without prescriptions

Anonymous said...

order viagra online cheap viagra birmingham - herbal viagra for women us

Anonymous said...

cheap viagra online generic viagra united kingdom - viagra usa

Anonymous said...

cheap viagra viagra online to us - generic viagra cheap

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription buy viagra online mastercard - men's health viagra online

Anonymous said...

generic cialis generic cialis effectiveness - canadian cialis reviews

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription viagra overdose - online pharmacy for generic viagra

Anonymous said...

generic cialis order cialis with prescription - cialis indications

Anonymous said...

buy cialis buy cialis johor bahru - cialis reviews

Anonymous said...

generic tadalafil is generic cialis bad - cialis 40 mg price

Anonymous said...

cheap cialis online cialis online canada no prescription - cialis last longer

Anonymous said...

cialis online no prescription cheap cialis generic no prescription - cialis online sydney

Anonymous said...

generic cialis brand cialis online canada - generic cialis tadalafil

Anonymous said...

cialis online canada where to buy cialis online in uk - order cialis online canada

Anonymous said...

cheap tadalafil cialis купить киев - buy cialis from uk

Anonymous said...

buy cialis buy cialis online with mastercard - generic cialis vs cialis

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online tramadol 50 mg much - tramadol for dogs pain relief

Anonymous said...

buy soma online buy soma seeds - soma medication uses

Anonymous said...

buy viagra online cheap viagra meds - buy viagra online england

Anonymous said...

viagra online cheap viagra with mastercard - viagra 40 pills for 99

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol soma soma conference - soma abuse

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online no prescription buy cheap cialis online no prescription - cialis daily price

Anonymous said...

buy soma online can i buy soma online - soma san diego seating chart

Anonymous said...

buy soma online cheap soma online overnight - soma 350 mg tab

Anonymous said...

soma online buy soma online us - buy soma online overnight

Anonymous said...

cheap soma online street value for soma 350 mg - foster people soma san diego tickets

Anonymous said...

soma drug soma drug properties - soma medication online

Anonymous said...

buy soma online soma bras amazon - buy soma tickets

Anonymous said...

soma online soma little rock - cheap holidays soma bay

Anonymous said...

buy soma online soma muscle relaxer wikipedia - soma bras las vegas

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online online pharmacy usa generic cialis - cialis daily efficacy

Anonymous said...

soma online map of soma san diego - soma bras outlet

Anonymous said...

retin a online retin a gel for hair - retin a gel generic

Anonymous said...

buy retin a retin a .1 micro - buy retin otc

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online 100mg of tramadol high - generic version of tramadol

Anonymous said...

where to buy retin-a online retin-a micro use every other day - how to buy retin a micro

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol free shipping safest place buy tramadol online - tramadol vs hydrocodone

Anonymous said...

order tramadol no prescription overdose on tramadol - can you buy tramadol in the usa

Anonymous said...

order tramadol overnight tramadol online pharmacy - tramadol euphoria dose

Anonymous said...

tramadol 50 mg tramadol withdrawal 2011 - tramadol dosage pain

Anonymous said...

order retin-a online retin a cream usa - what retin a micro gel used for

Anonymous said...

cheap tramadol tramadol online order - tramadol dosage greyhounds

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tramadol for dogs drug interactions - addiction to tramadol symptoms

Anonymous said...

order retin-a retin-a manufacturer - buy retin boots

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online tramadol kidney - buy tramadol online missouri

Anonymous said...

tramadol cheap buy tramadol with a mastercard - tramadol 100mg er

Anonymous said...

cheap tramadol tramadol hcl long term use - buy ultram with no prescription

Anonymous said...

cheap tramadol buy ultram online no prescription overnight - buy tramadol with paypal

Anonymous said...

xanax online xanax xr side effects - xanax 901 s yellow pill

Anonymous said...

tramadol online tramadol vicodin addiction - buy tramadol online no prescription next day delivery

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol overnight cod tramadol jaw pain - tramadol dosage slow release

Anonymous said...

tramadol online tramadol dosage for small dogs - buy tramadol hcl

Anonymous said...

generic xanax xanax for anxiety side effects - xanax side effects and uses

Anonymous said...

tramadol online buy generic tramadol online - tramadol dosage effects

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tramadol online overnight saturday delivery - tramadol extended release side effects

Anonymous said...

buy carisoprodol carisoprodol detection drug test - carisoprodol soma 350mg

Anonymous said...

tramadol 100 tramadol 50 mg opiate - tramadol 100mg/1ml

Anonymous said...

cialis online cialis daily blood pressure - once daily cialis reviews

Anonymous said...

http://landvoicelearning.com/#74967 tramadol 50 mg kapszula - tramadol hcl mechanism of action

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online mastercard overnight tramadol urine drug screen - tramadol 50 mg how many get high

«Oldest ‹Older   1 – 200 of 210   Newer› Newest»