Friday, March 9, 2007

How Netflix Made Me a Better Man

Oh, Netflix. You have so much to offer this world. The Moustache would like to personally thank you for guiding me to such glorious and great things.

Seriously, though, Netflix recently had a contest posted out to nerds across the country to work on their recommendation engine. The idea was the improve their algorithm or whatever sort of nerdy thing is used to determine what I like. I wouldn't know. I'm not a nerd. But yeah, some nerd helped things out, but it still doesn't make much sense.

Discover the intimate details of my Netflix recommendations after the jump...

So a couple of weeks ago I decided that I was going to check out this Extras that's all the rage with the kids. So I get my two discs of Ricky Gervais fun and excitement in the mail and am ready for my new awkward experience that I've been seriously been missing since The Office was removed from the British airwaves.

It was funny and everything I could hope for. I wanted more. Like a heroin junkie I requested for some recommendations based on my stellar review (5 stars, Ricky, if you're reading). As I waited for the consequences of my review to come across I was imagining all the British humour glory that was to be discovered, to be loved, to be laughed at. The recommendations came and, much to my surprise, what was recommended to me was Who Killed the Electric Car and When the Levee Broke.

Ok, Who Killed the Electric Car? could have easily been played off at a party with a simple phrase like, "Seriously, the electric car surviving? What a joke!" Then me and my rich conservative friends would have clinked our tumblers filled with scotch in triumph of another well played joke only to adjust our monacles afterward due to the steam created from laughing so hard.

But When the Levee Broke? Seriously? That's like, Netflix, being that friend that goes, "You want to laugh? Do you? LAUGH AT THIS YOU IGNORANT, SELF-INDULGENT ASSHOLE!!! Dead people would love to laugh, but they can't. You want to know why? Do you? Then rent this movie next time you tell me you want something funny."

It was then that I realized my ways. How I really don't care about others. How Spike Lee could show me how to care again about those less fortunate than me. I went on a soul searching trek, dear readers, all the way to my fridge. Which was empty.

Then someone farted and I giggled.


Jerk Stupidneck said...

10 lb. moustache doesn't care about black people

10lb Moustache said...

The Moustache is only looking for laughs and if it's at the expense of black people...that's fine.

Jerk Stupidneck said...

May I suggest a Wayaans brothers movie?

10lb Moustache said...

I said funny...I guess I'll just stick with When the Levee Broke.