Wednesday, March 28, 2007

An Evening of Fine Dining and Baseball

You are cordially invited to the first ever Incredible Mr. Limpet All You Can Eat Gala of Fun! That's right, Mr. Limpet exits cyber-space and enters meat-space for the first time ever! And you, the reader, can be there in person!

Hot Sex! How do I make this happen?

Easy, get your ass online and buy tickets for the Dodgers vs. Padres game on Saturday, April 14. Be sure to sit in the All You Can Eat Pavilion.

Make the jump for full details.

Did I read this right? All You Can Eat Pavilion?

Yep. That's right. Mr. Limpet will be watching the game from the new ampm sponsored All You Can Eat Pavilion.

What happens in the All You Can Eat Pavilion?

We feast like kings.

But I don't want to look like a pig. Maybe I'll just save a few bucks and sit in the normal seats.

Fine. We really don't need your company anyway. It's an open invitation. Do whatever you want. Pussy.

Alright, I give. I'll be there.

You won't regret this. You'll be there to witness 10lb Mustache and Hats Bagelman battle to the death in the ultimate test of endurance and will. That's right. Competitive eating. Watch America's finest athletes gorge themselves to the brink of explosion. Winner takes all.


Did I mention Nacho Friendly will break out the gyro ball during the seventh inning stretch? Because he will. Also, there will be prizes.

You win. I'm going.

The Incredible Mr. Limpet Family looks forward to your presence.


Nacho Friendly said...

I'm announcing it here, as the first comment:

I, Nacho Friendly, realize my posts haven't cut the mustard of late, and thus, feel the best way to win back the love and admiration of my peers is to do the only rational thing I can:

I'm going to attempt to join the 9-9-9 Club at this game.

That's 9 beers and 9 hot dogs in 9 innings. Jerk Stupidneck already ruled I can't start during batting practice. Wish me luck. There will, most likely, be a photographic spread of said triumph*.

* - or utter failure.

Jerk Stupidneck said...

I'll be there both to officiate Nacho's entrance into the exclusive 9-9-9 club and to make sure that Bagelman follows through on his attempt to enter the "Self Love in a Trough Urinal" club

Should be a fun time for all. Bring your full bladders and meet Hats in the bathroom around the 3rd inning!

Hats Bagelman said...

Stupidneck I've been a proud member of the SLiaTU (Self Love in a Trough Urinal) club since 1999

10lb Moustache said...

I think it's important to note that I will be getting shitfaced drunk in the back of my pickup prior to batting practice.

Jerk Stupidneck said...

But can you repeat, Bagelman? Can you repeat?

And I think it's important that I note that when the police show up to take you malcreants away in the paddy wagon, I'll be standing at a safe distance pointing fingers and pretending not to know you.

Anonymous said...

My, my. Look at that fine photoshopping done by Mr. Feelings. Who knew he was such an artist?

There, Feelings. Is that enough praise for you?

Nacho Friendly said...

to be fair, that is some wikid photoshopping.

Fatty Arbuckle said...

I will send my regards to you fools via text message, from my box seat. Remember I am rich and thus better than you.

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